Munchkins, how you've hurt me...

Dear Munchy Donuts,

I'd like to just declare my adoration for your yummy donuts. The one with the oreo cookie topping is sheer genius. I also like the one filled with coffee cream, sinful though it may be. I should also commend your sales strategy: buy 1 for $1.20, buy 6 for $6.50 and buy 12 for $12. Brilliant! It makes greedy penny pinchers like me immediately justify buying in bulk.

Nonetheless, this I have against you: your packaging and customer service leaves much to be desired.

The first time I went there, I wanted to buy 6 donuts, since 12 is a bit too many even for me. You smiled so sweetly and told me that the boxes that held 6 donuts were no longer available, would I mind the 12 donut box? I said sure, just put 6 in there, I'm cool. Smilingly, you informed me that if I took the 12 donut box, I have to buy 12 donuts, cannot buy less. Buy 8 can or not, I asked. Cannot, you smiled. That's okay, that's okay, there will be more for everyone in the office, so I bought 12 and went on my way.

The second time I visited another of your chain, it seems like the person standing in front of me had the same problem. What? Out of 6 donut boxes again? Is this part of the sales strategy too, hmmm munchkins?

Today, I brought Intuition there, eager to impress him with your delectable donuts. He was suitably tempted by all the sugary treats and wanted to buy 2 boxes of 6 donuts, 1 box for his family and a box for mine. Just nice! 12 donuts for $12, no? No? You mean, "no"? But we're buying 12, we protested, just in 2 boxes of 6. 6 times 2 equals 12, and if we buy 12, we pay $12, no? You mean, if we buy 2 boxes of 6, we must pay $6.50 x 2? It does not make sense! You really mean it? You do not jest?

Sigh.

It's so sad, munchkins, it really is. It's not that we want to quibble over $1, but it's the small things like that that makes or breaks the customer's experience. I would like to dismiss it as a one time case, but your track record makes me unable to deny this undesirable trait in you. We could have had a really good relationship, but now, I see limited possibilities.

I wish you all the best. I must find other donut pastures now. I'm sure I won't be missed, you've always had a queue of admirers awaiting your sweet favours.